The Matt Cockburn Show

February 4, 2009- I Just Did Something Weird
4 February 2009, Cockburn @ 11:22 am

Have you ever accidentally, or, I should say, unintentionally, seen someone from your past that and it creeped you out? Me too. And it just happened. I don’t exactly know how, but it’s like how you search for a video on youtube about, say, Abraham Lincoln, and somehow you end up following the related videos on the side until you get to something like Midget Tossing. Then, you sit and wonder how.

So I’m on Facebook and I’m following “people I might know”. The middle part is hazy because I was aimlessly wandering but somehow I found an ex-girlfriend from like 8+ years ago. I won’t say her name but we’ll call her “She”. Now, she married, as far as I know, the guy she dumped me for. I don’t know his last name. But as I was looking at the picture that looked so much like her, I had to know if it was her. Keep in mind that if you are not friends with someone, you can’t see a picture larger than their profile thumbnail. So, I saved it, blew it up and sharpened the image and, lo and behold, there’s the smile I remember (a toddler in her arms). The strange thing was that she lives in Pennsylvania a cople of hours from me. Small world. But last I heard she moved to Baltimore. So, I viewed her friends. And there was her mom and many people who were alumni of her school.

What’s that you say? Stalker? Hardly. Curious. I thought about friending her until I remembered the last words I spoke to her. Something like: “You’re a c*nt-whore, c*cksucking, hoople-headed bitch. Fuck you!” So, I figured to let sleeping dogs lie. I genuinely feel bad about saying that to her because she is neither one of those things. She was a very nice girl who ruined our relationship by pressuring me, a 21 year old at the time, to marry her because she felt like an old maid at 23. We were only dating a month and a half when that came up. It freaked me out and as we got closer, I started pushing her away and she went… into the arms of a Hertz Rent A Car manager or some such thing.

Though it took me about 3 years to fully recover from that devastation, I came to realize that, while she was a great girl– funny, smart, cute, would have made a perfect wife/mother,  great in bed– I was actually in love with having sex with her. Once I came to said realization, it was easy to move on. But those words I spoke, in my immature 20-something male way, probably don’t make her say “I wonder what happened to Matt” or “Gee, he was swell. Too bad we’re not friends anymore.” Oh well, live and learn. I wish her well.

9 Commenti a “February 4, 2009- I Just Did Something Weird”

1. Steph_Frand — February 8, 2009 @ 2:31 pm
   

   Cockburn, if I can say one thing about you, even though i don’t know you, I would say that you are honest. at least you seem that way. If I were that girl I’d hate you but admire the hell out of you for your honesty!

2. Conzo — February 8, 2009 @ 2:33 pm
   

   He’s just saying
   what the rest of us men
   think, but are araid to say… especially in public

3. Conzo — February 8, 2009 @ 2:33 pm
   

   *afraid

4. Cockburn — February 8, 2009 @ 4:28 pm
   

   um… thanks?

5. sno — February 10, 2009 @ 5:48 am
   

   So..what was the bad thing you did?I thought you have naked pics of her or a video tape with some disturbing scenes,and you upload them on you tube…
   Why you drill in the past?Well yeah it was curiousity but I think for a moment you wished to be at her husband’s place…or you wished for a second, she wasn’t that happy as she looked on the pic.Hey Matt no ex is better than you or what you may have for future. You’ll find a chick better than this one,more beautiful and funny…and she will own the perfect qualities in bed.

6. Cockburn — February 10, 2009 @ 9:48 am
   

   no no no no no no, Sno. That was 8 years ago. I’m not the same person I was then and I am happy to keep my past where it belongs. I was genuinely curious and nothing more. Besides, isn’t it nice to reconnect if only to say “hi” to people you once knew? I have met someone much more to my liking. In fact each woman I have dated since the one in the above article has been a closer fit for me until I reached the most recent one. At least personality-wise. And we all know that, in the end, that matters most. Cuz the looks will fade. I used to be a GAP model.

7. Cockburn — February 10, 2009 @ 9:52 am
   

   oh and I don’t know what you mean by the “bad thing” I did. and for the record, if i were in the husband’s place, we woudl not be having this conversation now. I would not be in Gettysburg, which means I would not have met Paul and we would not have started the show. I am very happy with what I have done in my 20s NOT being ANYONE’S husband. I have lived a life of freedom. Now, it’s getting old, but I needed it, I took it, and I loved it. I have no regrets except that I started smoking when I was 15.

   So, don’t worry about me, pal. I’ve been right where I belonged all along. Besides, I thought you and I were getting married?

8. Sno — February 10, 2009 @ 12:53 pm
   

   WELL,PAL i like the NO NO NO NO part ahahahah.I like when you explane yourself.And yeah actualy weird is not bad right?And i feel funny when i am wrong!
   …Matt,arent you getting married for every femalelistener…coz thats what i noticed

9. admin — February 11, 2009 @ 8:24 am
   

   just you, sno. you seem to appreciate good people. so rare in this world these days

Scrivi un commento

Nome

E-mail (non verrà pubblicata)

Sito Web